Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Protection from the Mini-Destroyers

Some people worry about protecting the outside of their homes from burglars.  Some worry about zombies.  We, on the other hand, worry about protecting the inside of our home from the Mini-Destroyers. 

We have to be a little creative around here with childproofing.  The Mini-Destroyers are pretty smart when overcoming the obstacles we try to put in their way.  My friends all laugh because they think it's humorous how much we childproof our house.  Everything shown below is in addition to the childproofing that "normal" people do.  I personally don't find it funny that our kids have destroyed the kitchen table I refinished, broke the lid on our piano, tried to break the door on our new dishwasher, broke the microwave turntable, shop the in fridge for random things like Wasabi sauce and mayo (anything within easy reach), and broke my old netbook.

Introducing Mini-Destroyer #1 (AKA Miss C., Bugs, and Missy Boo)
  • This one is getting old enough to realize she can have her own opinion about everything and does.  She likes to break into our bedroom and steal my lip gloss.  She also steals mints from my purse and breaks microwave turn-tables.  She occasionally has a tendency to throw toys at her sister's head resulting in an ER visit and stitches.

Mini-Destroyer #2 (AKA:  Little Dude, Buddy)
  • This one has the most deceptive and infectious grin you've ever seen.  He makes you believe he could never create any sort of trouble.  He likes to break dishwashers, window screens and drawer fronts.  

Mini-Destroyer #3 (AKA: Miss A, Little Bug)
  • This one has a talent for climbing on the counter, dresser, piano, table, etc.  She likes to break computers, spit water on my carpet, throw away blender lids and steal my shoes.  She is also the most emotional girl I have ever met.

To thwart these mischevious munchkins, we have pretty much removed or locked down anything in our house.  Here are a some examples:

The piano lid is tied to the legs.  Little Dude has a tendency to slam fingers in the lid as he repeatedly slams it (this is how he broke it).  Also notice the missing bench.  It lives in the storage room for obvious reasons.

We replaced the dishwasher a few months ago because our old one leaked and didn't clean the dishes well.  Little Dude seemed to instinctively know that this one was new and must be destroyed.  He liked to open it up and climb in.  Luckily the door survived, but wouldn't have lasted much longer.

Miss C is horrible about getting into the fridge.  She'll open it up and stand there while the twins steal the Wasabi sauce (maybe if they had a taste that would teach them).  It just gets old.  She can still get the fridge open, so that's when we tie the handles together.

This is our bedroom door.  Miss C can easily open the doorknob lock.  This lock was required to keep her out of one of the few non-childproof places in the house.  There is also one of these on the linen closet.

The twins like to dance on the table and push the chairs up to the counter and get into everything else.  I got tired of saying "No" because they didn't hear me anyway.  We now tie the chairs up whenever not in use.


All the kids can get the deadbolt open on the front and back doors so we had to add the upper lock.

Opening and slamming the microwave door is a favorite pastime around here, and that got irritating.  Also, we didn't want to replace the mechanism for the turn-table again.

It's no wonder my kids make me tired.

Back to sewing posts tomorrow.

33 comments:

  1. LOL, there is a reason that *every* piece of furniture in my house is bolted to the walls, quite literally. i have 3 mini destroyers too!

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  2. I have four brothers and they were so crazy my mom had to install professional mall gates (the heavy iron ones!) in the house to keep them out of the really non child proof area!

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  3. I know, understand and have done most of that and more! We have moved on to catches and locks that simply make enough noise to alert us to food theft; they can now outwit any kiddi-proof device! Dammit!

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  4. OMG, and they look so sweet!! I think it's worse when there's a team.

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  5. Your kids make ME tired! Triple trouble. :)

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  6. Now I know what my mom felt like. When I was 4, she had a 1 year old boy, and twin boys. It was kind of like raising triplets. She farmed me off to my grandpa. I helped him deliver berries. Just hang in there. They will outgrow all of this.

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  7. Holy smokes!! lol (sorry, I couldn't help laughing) We did have to do the high locks on outer doors, but never had to tie chairs together. Or maybe I just never got that smart. ;D

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  8. Oh my goodness!! How old are they? That IS exhausting!

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  9. Kati,
    I don't know how you do it!! One little one exhausts me...but the idea of three little ones together? Woo-wee! You are my hero (or heroine...either one :)
    And I love all your fixes by the way. The chairs tied to the table has to be my favorite!

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  10. Wow. Just the idea of three troublemakers makes me tired!! How on earth do you do it?? :)

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  11. I have three little destroyers as well, so I can relate:) My 15 month old is very interested in the heating and air registers on the floor, and my husband and I cannot figure out a way to baby proof them. She is so small that we fear she might fall in.

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  12. With just Adie I didn't have to do much baby-proofing. She didn't get into too much and we had a small apartment. Having Chase has been a whole different ballgame. We have lots of locks and things in very high places. We've tried a fridge lock but it didn't hold up at all so I am constantly fighting with Chase to get out of the fridge. I can't even imagine having two of Chase to run after. I bet your house is still super clean and organized despite the chaos because you are amazing like that. The kids are dang cute though.

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  13. Wow! You're like Super Mom! I know how tired my one makes me - I'm in AWE that you get anything sewn while also holding down that fort FULL. You rock!

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  14. Just reading that made me tired! My 3 yr old granddaughter gets into enough stuff for me and I only have her here part-time. Enjoy it while you can, they will be off to college before you know it.

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  15. Forgive me for laughing, but this post is too funny. I'm long past wee ones, but our daughter has two boys who are 8 months and 21 months. I forwarded your post to her so she can prepare herself! We both want to know... What are those whitish-clear tab thingies you're using to prevent doors from being opened, like the frig?

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  16. You definitely have your hands full with that energetic bunch! When my "monsters" were little I don't remember seeing any door locks like the ones you have on the fridge. Our youngest like to put things into the fridge. If you were missing something that was the first place you looked. He also loved to keep his blankie in there so it was cold against his face lol. It won't be much longer and they will be "terrorizing" the school system lol.

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  17. Birth control baby!!! Just goes to show you how these kids have such dedicated parents!!

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  18. Seeing this, your quilts just got even more amazing. ;) I know how busy my two year old keeps me... I can only imagine all those little "destroyers!" Very comical though... :)

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  19. I love my sons but thank you for reminding me why I am glad they are grown with families of there own. Things like this are why when I vist them I make sure I have a motel room for sanity breaks!

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  20. This cracked me up! You have some clever little kiddos! My girls were really very good, and I never had big problems. My 15 month old is another story (esp. combined with the three year old's "assistance".)

    I also love that picture of Miss A! She looks like a little angel.

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  21. My mom used to take all of my dad's belts, string them together, and use them to belt all of the chair legs together under the table! We had ceramic floors, and after my sister climbed up on the table the very first time, my mom started with her belt trick.
    We also had a fence around our Christmas tree, and lots of other Stacey-proofing that I don't even remember any more!

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  22. Ah ha ha...Kati this just made my day! My boys played "chopsticks" with real chopsticks on our piano and chipped all the ivory keys.
    When we moved into our house, our oldest was only 2. The previous owners had locks everywhere (they had 3 girls) and I thought it was a little strange. Now I use the locks every day. The most frequently used locks ares are the super high lock on the pantry (my parent's now have one on theirs too) and the locks on the top of the refrigerator & freezer.
    I need to make you a little plaque like I have hanging in my kitchen that reads, "Lord, give me patience to deal with my blessings!"

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  23. Ha!! that's a great post. very clever kiddos and very clever parents. i have three young ones myself and it's a wonder and can go to the bathroom some days much less make a quilt. you are so prolific-- amazing!!!

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  24. Yikes! I don't blame you for battening down the hatches! How exhausting. My girls would rather draw on the walls, furniture, and/or quilts than slam doors or try to break things, so I just have to keep the markers out of reach at all times. Guess I'm lucky. : )

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  25. Oh my goodness, this makes me tired just reading! They sure do look adorable though...how deceptive :-)

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  26. What little cuties. Thanks for the post, it made me giggle.

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  27. hehe love that! I'm laughing with you here - I had a couple of those high door locks myself.

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  28. This is so funny. sounds like a good way to go on a diet.

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  29. Oh Kati, thank you so much for putting a dose of reality out into Blogland. This is EXACTLY how my house looks too. I actually almost choked on my lunch when I opened your post, it had me laughing so much. My similarities to you: high-up lock on the master bedroom, chairs tied to tables, flip locks on doors that go outside. I'm still trying to figure out how to toddler-proof the water faucets outside. Ideas? You seem very skilled at this. :)

    We've even taken our antique dining room side board and turned it around so they can't open the drawers. It's been like that for three years. I don't think I'll recognize it when we are able to turn it back around.

    Great post. Awesome.

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  30. Whoa. That's all I can say to that. I didn't think I could admire your output and creativity more, but now I do - knowing you have those monkeys to manage as well! Brava, mama!!

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  31. ha! I am the one scared to death of zombies! Did that come from our discussion? I dream of my zombie proof house!

    Your little destroyers are adorable!!!

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  32. I used to teach preschool (for various ages) but the most memorable was a class of three year olds who destroyed my classroom much like you describe. My heart goes out to you!

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